What we have been up to....

Hey everyone!!! I have been getting ready for "back to school". Skyler and I went clothes shopping and he found all the cool stuff that he wanted...Abercrombie, Hollister and Aeropostal shirts.....we had a No TAX day here, and took advantage of that.

We are also planning his 10th birthday party. We are going to do another swim party at the rec. center we have here ;-) It is just too hot outside to not include water ;-) He has decided on a a "football" theme, and wants ME to make a Football cake...this outta be interesting! LOL He said that MY cakes are better than The Cheesecake Factory cakes, and insisted on me baking one for his big day....I don't know about ALL THAT, but I guess Duncan Hines is a hit in my house ;-) ROFL....Joey said the same thing....I have made cakes from scratch...frosting from scratch, but nothing topped the box and can of premade stuff that you add water, eggs, oil, and some secret other stuff....I think it is all in the bottled water I use ;-) LOL....(Eye roll)

I will post pics ;-)

Other than that, nothing else has changed much...I am still at home, but will be finding a new job once Skyler is in school....I think I would pull my hair out sitting here all day by myself.

My sister-in-law gave me a picture that she took with her camera (above) , of me in my faux pas fashion crisis outfit.....thought I'd share it...Connie will appreciate this one, because she ALWAYS loved the way I dressed myself when I was 5!!!! LOL... If you look real close you will see that I am wearing BOOTS with Capri's. Soooo Sexy, isn't it? ROFL.... Hey! If you are gonna play with cows, you MUST wear BOOTS, right?????

I miss you guys!!!!!

I'm still here! ;-)

Hey everyone!! I am Still here! We have had company ....I have come to the realization that I am too old for little ones, and my house isn't even remotely CLOSE to being "child proofed" even though I still technically have a child in the house, ROFL....

I think I will stick with cats.....which we are happily thinning out on.....we only have 6 outside cats now, as oppossed to 15 outside cats!!! YEAH! We have been giving them to people who like them for chasing mice, rats and snakes away from barns and such.

Nothing new and exciting here.....we are getting ready for school to start August 14th, and for Skyler's 10th birthday on August 18th. I am not sure where we will have it, or what theme it will be, but he is getting excited. Last year we had a swimming party at the recreation center here, but I am not sure what he wants to do this year. Maybe skating????

Other than that, all is well!!!!!

I have been TERRIBLE about posting!!!

I know, I know, I have been SO BAD about blogging on here! Sorry!!!

We have been doing a lot of summer activities lately.....We bought season passes to two theme parks...one is kind of an "Old West" theme (think Knott's Berry Farm) and the other one is White Water Bay.....We have had a BLAST!

Summer is going by too quickly!!! That is for SURE! Come August, when school starts, I might actually have to get out there and get a part time job once again...YUCK! I am getting used to this stay at home Mommie stuff ;-)

Anyhow....I miss all of you!!! And I will try to be better about the blogging thing ;-)

Up above is my latest picture of me at my Sister-in-laws house...I was playing with cows!!!! HAHAH!!! This one ate out of my hand, and let me hug her! She was a total sweetheart!

I wonder if Connie remembers taking this picture at my Dad's house????

Who is in this pic??? My cousin Dwayne, Connie, my friend Cathy, Me (I am the smallest one), my cousin Kenny is behind Connie, and Davey is behind Dwayne (you can barely seee his socks) he was hiding from the camera!!! LOL

Summer so far!!!

This beautiful park "Turner Falls" is only 50 minutes from us! It is amazing!!!

We are having a fatastic summer, so far! We have season passes to all of our local theme parks and water parks, we have seen some amazing sites, and are just having an all around fantastic summer!!!! We have gone on little hikes, climbed down into a cave, and played in some of the "falls" around where we live.

Hope everyone has a fantastic Father's Day!!!!!

Emotional Week!

Well, last Wednesday, I got a call that I had been anticipating for 16 years... I got a call from my daughter, Hanna.

I have been in Hanna's life since she was born, but knew that I could not give her the life that I so desperately wanted her to have. I did not want her to live with the things that I had survived, and made the hardest decision I have ever had to make, and that was to give her to my loving friends, who have been awesome parents to her. Imagine giving birth to a brand new baby that you loved so much, so desperately, then handing her to someone else.....heartbreaking? Absolutely. It left a void and a hole in my heart for a very loooong time, even though I knew I was making the best choice I could for the one person I loved more than anything.

I have seen my daughter MANY MANY times through the years...Her first year, we met up for lunches and dinners, etc. We celebrated her first birthday together, over the course of several years it went on this way. When I had Skyler they visited us at my Grandmothers, and I have beautiful pictures of our 4 generations (My Grandma on dad's side, my Dad, Me, Hanna and Skyler). It would be the last time we ever had that moment, because my Grandma passed away 2 years later.

I watched my daughter in her school plays. I saw her perform her awesome dance productions, and even attended one of her church ceremonies when she was 13. I saw her again a year later when she was 14...but then I moved away. Talk about hard to do...I knew it would be quite a while until I could see the first love of my life again...the one that I loved more than even myself.

Even though I saw my daughter, she had no idea that I was her birth Mom. I was simply a "family friend". And that was a missing piece for me.

On May 14th, I got a phone call that would change all of that...The one where she found out who I was for real, and we spoke for quite a while...twice, actually. She found me on Myspace within an hour, and we added each other to our pages as quick as we could....

My final "piece" placed in the puzzle of my complicated life. It has been amazing, yet overwhelming at the same time. So many floods of emotion have overcome me this week. From joy, to saddness, and everything in between....

In the meantime,

This week Skyler became a 5th grader....we got his awards, one of which included a Principal's Award for maintaining straight A's ALL YEAR LONG!!!! YEAH, SKYLER!!!!! He has done SO well this year...I am SO PROUD!

He has been so understanding through all of this, and today when he came in and saw that I wasn't "quite right", he decided that he was going to change the mood in the household......He logged into his online page, started blasting a song called "Gummy Bear" and launched himself into the most hysterical wanna be stripper, crazy dance routine that I had ever seen. This boy really knows how to change the atmosphere, he always has, lol.

From the moment that I found out that I was pregnant with Skyler, even though things were not the most opportune, he has been my light at the end of every tunnel that I have gone through. His infectious smile melts my heart and takes my breath away, even when he does something wrong.....

I absolutely love my kids! What an emotional roller coaster this week has been!!!!

****UPDATE AS of later in the day******

More news...I just got a call from my daughters adoptive Mom...after 20-some years of marriage, they have decided to split. While I know that people do go through this, I am sad for them.....I am in shock right now. I just got the call from her a few minutes ago, and it is just settling into my brain.

This is so much to have happened all in one week....my daughter's head must be spinning as much as mine is, and I am an adult. Wow....what happens now? I guess we just continue on, and support one another, like we always do....

Hanna's Mom came to the hospital during one of the most painful times of my life...losing my Grandmother...She helped me get through that tragedy, now I hope I can be here to help her.

They say that adoption is a life long process....they were right.

Give and Take.....

Tonight before we went to bed, I realized that it was trash night....The little light in my head went off like a Blue light special in K-Mart...

"Honey..." I said....looking for the obvious response....

"Yes Dear...." I know he is thinking, "What does she want me to do now?"

I state the obvious....

"Ya know I was thinking....since we have such a Give and Take relationship, how about I GIVE you the trash from in the house, and you can TAKE it out to the street?"

At least it got a laugh outta him...and I got the trash taken out without having to ask 15 times.......